At the top of my Bag List is spending more quality time with Finn, my 4yr old son. No doubt if you have children, this is likely to be something you already strive to achieve and it can be quite a challenge for a multitude of reasons, relevant to your circumstances. I think it is fair to say that most parents want their children to feel safe, loved and happy, above all else. Giving them our undivided attention, noticing what makes them unique and encouraging those qualities, genuinely enjoying their company and having fun is crucial. It is so important to step away from the madness of our busy lives and prioritise just ‘being’ with our children. It is how we get to really ‘know’ them – they are incredibly unique, special little spirits with an important contribution to make to this world. Our role as parents is to nurture and support their spirit. Quite a responsibility. It is also an exciting privilege.
Finn’s Dad and I are separated and share equal 50:50 custody which we think is brilliant for Finn. Naturally I miss him when he is not with me but this is how we have operated for more than half of Finn’s life so we don’t really know any different. I have also learned to see the positive’s in our situation. I have a very happy and loving little boy who has an excellent relationship with both his parents. I do not consider the time when Finn is not with me as a negative. I see it as an opportunity for me to get some ‘me time’ and focus on my business – both which ultimately benefit Finn – while knowing that Finn is getting the type of attention and love that only his dad could give him.
Despite only spending half of every week with Finn, I still sometimes find having the energy and focus for him a challenge which often makes me feel so guilty. A useless emotion, but very real none-the-less! I guess it is all about balance so today, I made it all about Finn. I asked him what he wanted to do and being a boy that likes the simple things in life, he said he wanted to go to the local play-park and then he wanted to feed and walk the neighbour’s dogs. So, I packed a picnic lunch and off we went. He had my undivided attention and we both loved every minute of it.
It has been so lovely today to just ‘be’ in my son’s company. To enjoy what he enjoys, which is so seriously simple – playing hide-and-seek about the house, eye-spy in the car, swings, climbing frames, singing to the radio (every song is his ‘favourite’!), walking the dogs with our neighbours, eating dinner together and enjoying a bed-time story. It doesn’t get any more simple and he couldn’t have been happier. Neither could I.
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