Today I felt a very strong need to meditate. I have felt a little disconnected by my ‘to-do’ list lately. I have been so busy ‘doing’ and not spending much time ‘being’. That’s ok but the balance needed to be restored today.

So, after putting Finn to bed, I took up my favourite position on the back step – this time wrapped in a warm blanket – to connect with all that is real and true. I let go of my to-do list – which is never ending – and prioritised this time to myself.

I began my meditation with very specific intention tonight. I wanted to connect with my spirit and the universe. I also wanted an answer to a question.

I experienced a series of memories – some recent, some from my childhood, some were medieval. They all linked together seamlessly and in my meditative state they all made perfect sense but when I came back into consciousness, it was hard to make sense of what I experienced. I wasn’t asleep and I wasn’t dreaming. I wasn’t thinking either. I was feeling and remembering. I re-lived past experiences which together are beginning to give me the answer to my question. I feel I know the answer I was looking for but it will take a little time for it to sink in and for me to understand how to process the information.

I sat for a little while after meditation. The sun had gone down, the moon had shifted a few centimetres, a bright star had appeared and the trees looked beautiful silhouetted against the deep blue sky. The birds began to sing so beautifully and so loudly. I have never heard anything like it in my garden before. They were very excited about something! Then some cows in a field nearby started to chime in. They were really going for it! It was incredible. Nature seemed to be telling me to ‘listen’. I didn’t have a choice! I honestly felt like the excitement was for me. Pretty amazing.

It’s funny how my to-do list suddenly seems so unimportant having spent this time connecting inwardly and then with nature. I feel so peaceful and like the answers to my questions will continue to unravel without any effort from me. The Universe has been given direction and is now silently putting things in place so that I will come to a resolution very soon. The effortless faith I feel is incredible.