How do I ensure this time it lasts?

Here’s what I know. Physical attraction lasts a nano-second in the whole scheme of things. So, if you don’t have a mental and emotional connection with someone, there just isn’t any longevity.

If you have the physical attraction plus mental attraction then your interest in someone has a slightly longer life-span.

The real juice is emotional attraction. When we feel able to connect emotionally with someone, we are creating intimacy and that’s the stuff of fulfilling longevity.

To have a healthy emotional connection with someone else requires you to have a healthy emotional connection with yourself first. I am not saying you need to have perfected emotional mastery but you do need to have a solid, trusting, committed and ‘best friend like’ emotional connection with yourself.

When you have intimacy with yourself you can create intimacy with someone else.

Intimacy is fulfilling and that lasts because it allows two committed people to journey together as their souls evolve, diving deeper and deeper into the discovery of each-other. That is an adventure of a lifetime!

I have a history of relationships that were full of drama and incredibly painful as a result because we were two emotionally unhealed people essentially coming together to be healed. There was purpose to the relationships (everything has a reason) and some healing did occur but we created additional wounds in the process because we hadn’t done the work individually to heal. We hadn’t journeyed alone, into the depths of our individual experiences of shame, hurt and abandonment to heal our hearts.

Let me re-iterate, you do not need to be perfect for your soul mate to find you. You do need to do the human work to clear the path for him to come in so that you can continue the journey of healing and expansion together.

You deserve a relationship that is a trusting, open and loving experience. First, you need to have a trusting, open, loving experience of yourself.

Self-Love is the path that will clear the way for your ‘one’ to come in and and then life long lasting intimacy is pretty much guaranteed!




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