{LOVE NOTE} How To Stop Feeling Disappointed With Yourself

There has been a theme with my clients lately – an anger with themselves for not doing what they said they were going to do or for not having what they want.

They are pissed because they know they are letting themselves down.

It doesn’t matter the desire – whether it be losing weight, making more money, meeting your soul mate, {insert your own desire here} – there is a very practical step required to get what you want that CANNOT be missed.


How often have you said, “I am going to start that diet”?

So, why don’t you do it? 

Of-course there could be psychological reasons, belief systems, habitual behaviours and so forth. It also boils down to lack of preparation. 

How can you start eating well when your cupboards are still full of sugar, processed food, caffeine and booze!? Preparation is required to clear out your cupboards of those things and re-stock them with healthy, life giving foods. 

How can you start a healthy eating regime when you don’t even know what that looks like or what works for your body? If you haven’t hired the nutritionist or done the reading or created a menu plan or made a decision on what you will be eating throughout each-day?

When you are discovering a brand new way of nourishing your body, that requires a lot of preparation and often a lot of support. 

An empowered woman would set up that support. Without it, you will wake up perpetually angry and disappointed with yourself because you haven’t started eating clean. Again!  

You have got to set yourself up for success. Success doesn’t just happen.

A key component to calling in your desires is a vision around that desire. If all you know is what you don’t want, then that’s what you will create. So, preparation is required to create the vision. 

I knew for a long time that I didn’t want to be single. I would wake up every morning feeling sad and frustrated about being single. That is what I was focussed on and so I re-created that experience morning after morning.

I wanted to connect to my vision but that felt so hard because I hadn’t done the preparation for it.

I had to take time out to get clarity on what I wanted and to notice any belief systems that came up when I was honest with myself about that – those beliefs that said ‘you can’t have that’ or ‘that doesn’t even exist’ or ‘that’s too good to be true’ or  ‘you’re not worthy of that’. Then I hired a coach to support me with the healing work around those beliefs so that I could create a vision for what I was calling in that felt really good, alive and true for me.

When I desired to go to the vision, I didn’t have to figure it out. I had done that work so that I could dive deep into the juicy excitement of my desired relationship. I went on to successfully created that ‘miraculous’ relationship. Preparation with support was key.

An empowered woman is prepared.

She knows the relationships in her life that trigger her to react on emotional auto-pilot rather than to consciously and lovingly respond. When we react we feel emotionally out of control and disappointed in ourselves – it’s so disempowering!

If you desire to stand in your power and respond calmly and with love around the more challenging relationships in your life, you need to plan how you will do that in advance.

That planning could require the healing of sabotaging belief systems; planning a clearing conversation; choosing your response when faced with a typical comment that would usually have you retaliate etc.  

Planning requires you to take time out to stop and reflect on who you are, what you want, what you think about yourself, what you value, how you desire to show up in the world, what you desire to put into your body, how you’d like to respond to challenging life situations and so forth.

An empowered woman is consciously committed to being and feeling her best self. She isn’t on auto-pilot – a puppet to her conditioning and programming. 

She knows she is meant for more and she paves the way for that!

Any serious sports player prepares. They do the work – the exercise, the nutrition, the practice, the mindset, the coach.

If you want emotional, mental or life mastery – you’ve got to do the preparation work to create that. 

If you want to be a spiritual warrior, preparation via a daily practice is key. 

You can do some preparation work on your own but when it comes to true mental, physical, emotional and spiritual mastery, you get support. You hire a coach.

I am unapologetic about inviting you to hire a coach because when I have experienced the greatest success with the most life long lasting change I had the support of a coach and I chose to love myself enough to make that investment on all levels.

When it comes to preparation, half the battle is actually being able to see what you can’t see for yourself. How can you prepare yourself to have the mastery you desire if you can’t actually see for yourself what needs to change? You know you want to show up differently. You know you want to feel differently. But for the life of you, you can’t see the root cause of what is relentlessly setting you up for failure! Sure, there will be some pieces that you know in your gut that you need to change but you don’t know how – enter the coach. And more often than not, the pieces which are truly sabotaging you, you will be unconscious to because if you knew what they were you would have done something about it. Right?

People hire a coach because they know that there is something going on within them that’s sabotaging them but they can’t see it for themselves and they need help with that. 

There’s no shame in asking for help, by the way! I actually think it’s such a strength to reach out for support. It takes real vulnerability and self honesty! I honour those qualities in a woman. Deeply. 

So, following the theme of preparation today I invite you to prepare for your next level of growth by asking yourself:

Where are the energy leaks in my life?
What about me requires mastery?
What needs to change?
How am I letting myself down?
Why am I not getting what I want?
What could I do to create what I desire?

If you want real, true change, hire a coach.

At The School of Self Love we have a huge range of support options available – from home study courses to retreats to private coaching. You can take a look at our courses by clicking HERE.

If you have any questions for me or would like to explore your support options, just hit reply to this email and let me know. 

I so desire for you to feel your best self. With support, you can!

With all my love,
Katie xx
Founder of The School of Self Love

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Do you dare to love yourself?

Our curriculum responds to the wider needs of women who know in their hearts that they were put on the earth to do something special.

If you are willing to drop your self-sabotaging conditioning, stop listening to the voice of self doubt and exhausting yourself with emotional gymnastics, then your mighty life awaits!

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